Showing posts with label Conan the Barbarian. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Conan the Barbarian. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Conan the Adventurer, Episode 2

From Hyborean Apocrypha


Conan: The Adventurer - Episode 2, The Heart of the Elephant part 2

Episode Two opens with Conan and Otli are sitting beside a river having a theological discussion about the nature of Crom's attitude towards testing as a form of caring. Just as the debate is heating up, a woman attacks and kicks Conan into the river. Her troops then arrive and take Otli and Conan prisoner.. Conan winds up in her bed, but then rebukes her and gets dressed. We learn the woman's name is Carella, Queen of Thieves. She's curious as to where Conan is headed, to which he answers to find the Wizard Yara, Carella too wishes to find Yara, to steal his magic Jewel. This Jewel is the Heart of the Elephant, to which this two parter gets its name. Conan replies that he is not interested in the jewel, only in rescuing Tamira. After calling him foolish for this quest, she offers herself to Conan once more, but he replies he only wants to collect Otli and get going.

Zzeben and Vulkar are still following Conan, They come across some of the survivors from Tamiras Village who are likewise looking for Conan. Hoping he will lead them to fight back against Hissar Zhul, They go with the survivors. The Farmers wish to attack a passing band of Zhul's troops, and Zzeben and Vulkar organize them to do it right. Meanwhile Otli and Conan have made it to Arenjun to find Yara. Before Conan enters the wizard's lair, Otli urges caution and Conan remarks"wizards can die". Shortly after Conan finds Tamira, but is captured by Yara. Yara imprisons Tamira in a mirror and tasks with an errand or he will keep her imprisoned forever. The Task is to retrieve his Jewel, the Heart of the elephant, Stolen by the creature which guards the tower.

Otli and Conan begin investigating the problem placed before them by Yara, and run into Carella again. Conan and Carella make a bargain, she gets all of the other stones, but Conan gets to return the Heart of the Elephant to Yara in exchange for Tamira's life. Venturing into the chamber with the Heart alone, Conan discovers it is guarded by a giant spider. Conan fights with it for a while, but quickly subdues it and makes his way deeper into the tower and discovers a large creature sitting on a throne. It relates to him how it taught Yara but he wanted all the power.

The large creature tells Conan that the stone was never Yara's but was his, and that Yara has been attempting to steal it for decades.. It tells Conan to kill it, and squeeze its heart's blood over the gem before taking it to Yara. It also tells Conan to deliver a message, That Yag-Kosha sends one last gift. The Task completed, the Jewel secured, Conan returns to Yara's Keep.

Unbeknown to Conan, General Goroth takes Tamira from yara and stabs her. Conan hands over the gem, and demands to know where Tamira is. Yara explains about Goroth and takes the gem, Conan says the words from Yag-Kosha and Yara is destroyed. He races to where Tamria is, where he has a few moments before she dies. And then the hunt for Goroth is on. Goroth returns to report to Hissar Zhul, that he has slain Tamira and called off the search for Conan. Zhul at first is furious, until Goroth explains that now out of Vengeance, Conan will come to him.

Conan and Otli meet Zzeben and Vulkar on the road to find Hissar Zhul. They relate how they have been gathering villagers and others tired of living under Zhul's rule. Conan speechifies a bit in order to motivate the villagers to follow him against Zhul for Revenge or Freedom. Along the way Conan and the Villagers join forces with Carellas thieves and bandits. And the Makeshift army marches against Hissar Zhul. Upon arrival this army is observed by Goroth, who plans to ambush them.

But Conan has already laid his own ambush and dispatches Goroth's Army ending by drowning Goroth. The Magic skull which Zhul converses with informs him that the battle went badly, and also that Conan is heading towards Zhul's castle soon. The skull suggests also that the better part of valor is discretion and that they should flee before he arrives. As the army arrives, Zhul's castle vanishes. Conan, Otli, Zzeben, and Vulkar set off to find Hissar Zhul and so the arc of the next twenty episodes is established.


Stories "Borrowed from" - "The Tower of the Elephant", Conan The Mercenary, and Conan and the Sorcerer


This episode is not even close to being bad, atleast until after the death of Tamira.. Zzeben and Vulkar, Otli and Carella are all decent enough characters but seeing Conan blubbering about Tamira. It was ridiculous when Milius had Swarzegnegger do it in the movie.. but at least Valeria was something special.. In the context of the film.. Tamira is just a farm girl who Conan only met a few days previously who's father was Mickey Rooney! It seems rather strange he would be so enthralled to her already..

Still the second act of the episode was an improvement over both the first episode and the first half of the second episode. Though its shaping up to be better than some of the Steve Perry novels anyway.. at least in so far.. there are no talking animals.. be thankful for small blessings I suppose.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

...The Longest Fantasy Series?

After finding a link to a very interesting thread in which a courageous internet delver is attempting to make a list of the longest fantasy series in the world. I noticed that a certain mighty barbarian stood atop the pile... But something didn't quite look right. The number of books seemed much too low.. it was in fact nearly 14 short of the total number of Conan books.. and a further 15 short of having all the "Hyborean Apocrypha" included.

So I set out to rectify this.

According to my count, the 66 Conan titles published by various companies over nearly 40 years which comprise the loosely interconnected "Journeys of Conan" as it seems to be called total up to some 16000+ pages.. putting it well past the second closest, Discworld by nearly 3000 pages.

When one adds in the Hyborian age outriggers, Red Sonja and Age of Conan.. It balloons even further, to nearly 22,000 pages total.

So after researching everything, I present the following list with # of pages according to the editions which I own and/or can reference on Amazon.

#1 Lancer/Ace #1 Conan 221 pages
#2 Lancer/Ace #2 Conan of Cimmeria 190 pages
#3 Lancer/Ace #3 Conan the Freebooter 223 pages
#4 Lancer/Ace #4 Conan the Wanderer 222 pages
#5 Lancer/Ace #5 Conan the Adventurer 224 pages
#6 Lancer/Ace #6 Conan the Buccaneer 191 pages
#7 Lancer/Ace #7 Conan the Warrior 222 pages
#8 Lancer/Ace #8 Conan the Usurper 256 pages
#9 Lancer/Ace #9 Conan the Conqueror 296 pages
#10 Lancer/Ace #10 Conan the Avenger 192 pages
#11 Lancer/Ace #11 Conan of Aquilonia 171 pages
#12 Lancer/Ace #12 Conan of the Isles 189 pages

Total # 2597 Pages

#13 Ace Conan and the Sorcerer 186 pages
#14 Ace Conan the Mercenary 187 pages
#15 Ace Conan and the Flame Knife 160 pages
#16 Ace Conan and the Treasure of Tranicos 191 pages

Total # 724 pages

#17 Ace/Bantam/Tor #13/#1/#47 Conan the Swordsman 256 pages
#18 Ace/Bantam/Tor #14/#2/#48 Conan the Liberator 256 pages
#19 Ace/Bantam/Tor #15/#3/#45 The Sword of Skelos 224 pages
#20 Ace/Bantam/Tor #16/#4/#43 Conan The Road of Kings 224 pages
#21 Ace/Bantam/Tor #17/#6/#44 Conan the Rebel 224 pages
#22 Ace/Bantam/Tor #18/#5/#49 Conan and the Spider God 256 pages
#23 Bantam #7 Conan the Barbarian 192 pages

Total # 1632 pages

#24 Tor #1 Conan the Invincible 288 pages
#25 Tor #2 Conan the Defender 288 pages
#26 Tor #3 Conan the Unconquered 288 pages
#27 Tor #4 Conan the Triumphant 320 pages
#28 Tor #5 Conan the Magnificent 288 pages
#29 Tor #6 Conan the Destroyer 288 pages
#30 Tor #7 Conan the Victorious 288 pages
#31 Tor #8 Conan the Valorous 288 pages
#32 Tor #9 Conan the Fearless 288 pages
#33 Tor #10 Conan the Renegade 288 pages
#34 Tor #11 Conan the Raider 288 pages
#35 Tor #12 Conan the Champion 288 pages
#36 Tor #13 Conan the Defiant 256 pages
#37 Tor #14 Conan the Marauder 228 pages
#38 Tor #15 Conan the Warlord 288 pages
#39 Tor #16 Conan the Valiant 288 pages
#40 Tor #17 Conan the Hero 288 pages
#41 Tor #18 Conan the Bold 288 pages
#42 Tor #19 Conan the Great 288 pages
#43 Tor #20 Conan the Indomitable 288 pages
#44 Tor #21 Conan the Freelance 288 pages
#45 Tor #22 Conan the Formidable 288 pages
#46 Tor #23 Conan the Guardian 288 pages
#47 Tor #24 Conan the Outcast 288 pages
#48 Tor #25 Conan the Rogue 320 pages
#49 Tor #26 Conan the Relentless 288 pages
#50 Tor #27 Conan the Savage 320 pages
#51 Tor #28 Conan of the Red Brotherhood 288 pages
#52 Tor #29 the Gods of the Mountain 288 pages
#53 Tor #30 the Treasure of Python 288 pages
#54 Tor #31 Conan the Hunter 256 pages
#55 Tor #32 Scourge of the Bloody Coast 256 pages
#56 Tor #33 Conan and the Manhunters 288 pages
#57 Tor #34 Conan at the Demon's Gate 288 pages
#58 Tor #35 Conan the Gladiator 288 pages
#59 Tor #36 Conan and the Amazon 288 pages
#60 Tor #37 Conan and the Mists of Doom 288 pages
#61 Tor #38 Conan and the Emerald Lotus 288 pages
#62 Tor #39 Conan and the Shaman's Curse 256 pages
#63 Tor #40 Conan, Lord of the Black River 288 pages
#64 Tor #41 Conan and The Grim Grey God 224 pages
#65 Tor #42 the Death Lord of Thanza 272 pages
#66 Tor #46 Conan of Venarium 272 pages

Total # 12196 pages

#67 Ace Red Sonja #1 246 pages
#68 Ace Red Sonja #2 224 pages
#69 Ace Red Sonja #3 183 pages
#70 Ace Red Sonja #4 217 pages
#71 Ace Red Sonja #5 200 pages
#72 Ace Red Sonja #6 199 pages

Total # 1269 Pages

#73 Ace Age of Conan #1 Legends of Kern #1 336 pages
#74 Ace Age of Conan #2 Legends of Kern #2 304 pages
#75 Ace Age of Conan #3 Legends of Kern #3 336 pages
#76 Ace Age of Conan #4 Heretics of Set #1 288 pages
#77 Ace Age of Conan #5 Heretics of Set #2 272 pages
#78 Ace Age of Conan #6 Heretics of Set #3 264 pages
#79 Ace Age of Conan #7 Soldiers Quest #1 304 pages
#80 Ace Age of Conan #8 Soldiers Quest #2 288 pages
#81 Ace Age of Conan #9 Soldiers Quest #3 288 pages
#82 Ace Age of Conan #10 Marauders #1 240 pages
#83 Ace Age of Conan #11 Marauders #2 240 pages
#84 Ace Age of Conan #12 Marauders #3 240 pages

Total # 3400 Pages

Grand Total # 21818 pages

Sunday, February 7, 2010

2. Ace Conan #1.1, Conan: The Thing in the Crypt

From Hyborean Apocrypha


The Thing in the Crypt by L. Sprague DeCamp and Lin Carter.

In this installment find our hero newly escaped from Hyperborean slavery, we're told that while others slept, he quietly wore threw one link in his chain in order to break it and escape. Clearly all those people who say Conan isn't a thinking man, haven't read that. He's escaped from the dungeons yes, but not from Hyperborea. He eluded their hounds, sent after him, But not the wolf pack that picked up his scent. Conan is trying to go south over the mountains into Brythunia. And on into Zamora, with its major cities, Shadizar, Arenjun and Yezud..

He reaches the mountains and finds a cave of some sort, journeying in through the cobwebs. A cave? Or more like a Tomb, littered with treasured objects of the dead. A Chariot, and on a throne at the back, sits a giant. Though the narrator stops to ponder of what race this giant belongs, and from whence he came and how long ago.. Conan is rather more pragmatic, his gaze fixes on the sword which lay across the knees of the giant.

Conan takes the sword, after spending a bit of time reflecting on its make. Shocked that its blued iron and not bronze. This is the first real indication of his Fathers profession, which Conan likely would know a good deal about as well.

But all is not what it seems as the mummy lurches slowly upward, seemingly enraged at having its sword stolen. we are treated to a rather lengthy duel between the mummy and Conan. But our protagonist triumphs and after grabbing a few more spoils from the tomb, leaves to continue his march south.


If this scene sounds familiar, its because Oliver Stone incorperated it in his script which was adapted for John Milius's, Conan the Barbarian(1982) Though the skeleton stayed dead in the movie.

The first half of this story, filled with exposition and guesses on the nature of the Hyborian age, and the obvious mechanical fascination involved in wearing down a chain link.. is in my opinion LSDC's contribution.. while the much less interesting second half featuring the battle with the Mummy is Lin Carter's.. He wrote a lot of stories featuring statues and mummys which come to life.

I liked the first half, but not the second particularly.
So I give this one **1/2 out of *****

The Thing in the Crypt -
Locations: the Hyperborean slopes of the Graskill Mountains
Towns, cities and other palces: A Tomb in the mountains
Characters: Conan (age about 15)
Languages Spoken: Cimmerian, Aesir

Up next is Conan the Defiant by Steve Perry.