44. Ace Conan #2.8, The Snout in the Dark by Robert E. Howard and L. Sprague Decamp

Conan, now in Meroe the Capital city of Kush, fresh from his adventures in the southern black kingdoms, rescues a queen named Tananda. It seems that Tananda is the cuase of some ire for a dark wizard who is using a conjuration to eliminate political prisoners and then blaming the deaths on the queen. Conan of course can't help but get involved and soon finds himself a captain of the queen's guard. He helps interrogate a suspicious nemedian slave girl before eventually unraveling the plot against the queen.  Conan and the slave girl are nearly killed, but the conjured creature is gravely wounded and returns to it's master, alerting a large crowd of who is behind the killings in the process. Soon a rebellion is rocking the city of Meroe, and Conan and the slave girl decide to leave town.

This is an attempt by DeCamp to finish an REH fragment, I'm not sure how much is which writer, and to be honest it's pretty mediocre. It really rounds off the bulk of this particular book which isn't really that great of a representation of REH's Conan at his best. It contains quite a few stories where Conan either espouses some very nasty opinions, threatens nefarious deeds, or simply runs away in a rather un Conan-like manner. That being said this volume of the ACE series does contain what is one of the BEST Conan, and possibly REH stories ever, Queen of the Black Coast. The rest function more as an Anchor attempting to drag down QotBC than anything else.

Up next, Conan the Gladiator by Leonard Carpenter

42. Ace Conan #2.6, The Vale of Lost Women, By Robert E. Howard.

Conan, still living with the Bamulas, rescues a captive northern girl and fights a lovecraftian monstrosity.

I really don't like this story.. I don't want to get into any sort of armchair psychologist sort of thing with it.. I simply don't like it. I consider it to be one of the worst Conan stories, and also one of the worst REH stories I've read. Suffice to say I feel there is a reason why it was never published in the author's lifetime.. as it simply isn't up to the quality of work he normally produced and is also rife with problematic and extremely cynical (even for Howard) views of the world.

That being said, I think that the Characterization of Conan himself is still quite good.. showing his frustration with the Bamulas and other tribes in the Black Kingdoms.. while also showing he is still a man of honor with no truck with rapists or those who force themselves on women.

Up next, The Castle of Terror by L. Sprague DeCamp and Lin Carter

40. Ace Conan #2.5, Queen of the Black Coast, part 2, By Robert E. Howard

The finale of Queen of the Black coast picks up some time after the events of Conan the Rebel, many other adventures have unfurled off page in the time which Conan has been with Belit, he's now about 25.

Belit issues orders for her crew to set sail up a nameless river somewhere in the regions south of Kush, before long they find themselves in a dense jungle and come upon a ruined and forgotten city. Belit finds a necklace which induces madness and she and the crew are all soon killed by a winged monster which guards the city.  Conan, riven with grief sets out to destroy the monster, and is on the verge of being killed when the ghost of Belit intervenes and gives him strength. Conan afterwords burns Belits body and the ship. Conan, grief stricken, with his future unknown and dubious chances of survival, sets off alone into the forbidding jungle.

"Queen of the Black Coast" is, in my opinion, one of the best Conan stories which REH wrote.. following very closely on the heals of "Tower of the Elephant" in my rankings. It is a powerful story and does a great deal to advance and build upon Conan as a character. Gone is all pretense of a callow youth out only for adventure and material gain, present is a man seasoned by many battles and great personal loss. Though there have been many women in Conan's life by the time this story takes place, none of them had been as important to him as Belit, nor would any of them be missed in the same way as her.

This will likely be my last update for a while as classes started yesterday and I will be needing to get a handle on them before I continue any of my own personal projects.

Up Next, Conan at the Demon's Gate by Roland Green. Which based on the description on the back, I am decidedly not looking forward to.

38. Ace Conan #2.5, Queen of the Black Coast, part 1, By Robert E. Howard

As with most of Howard's stories I will only be giving a quick overview of the events as much better reviews are available elsewhere online, this story is split in half due to Poul Anderson's Conan the Rebel falling in between Chapters of the story.

Conan, runs afoul of the law in Argos and has to make a hasty escape. He gains passage aboard a trade ship, The Argus, which is headed south to Kush. On their way to Kush they are attacked by Belit, the Pirate Queen, and her black skinned reavers. Conan manages to join their crew through his prowess and because Belit is quickly taken by him. Soon the two are lovers and Conan is functioning as her right hand during the raiding expeditions.

31. Ace Conan #2.3 - "The Frost Giant's Daughter" - Robert E. Howard

After a long long hiatus, I'm going to try and get back to work on this project. What better way to start than with the story which, arguably, some say is the very first Conan story chronologically, but for my tastes, fits best here.

I feel that for the purposes of this Chronology which we are following, Conan is still, despite all of his adventures, a fairly young man. He is also a very frustrated man. For a brief re-cap of the last few volumes, Having allowed his appetites, fists and mouth to get him into trouble in Turan, and cost him his captaincy in the Turanian Army, Conan headed west and north for many days, eventually traveling back into his native Cimmeria. Finding the welcome not quite what he expected, and finding that the looming troubles of the south had even managed to follow him there, Conan has set off north once more, Intent on visiting the Aesir whom he had adventured with so much earlier in the series. "The Frost Giant's Daughter" - By Robert E. Howard, picks up some time after this revelrie. The Aesir + Conan have gone out to raid their perpetual enemies, the Vanir. In the process, Conan is tempted by the daughter of the frost giants, and allows his lust and anger at her to nearly lead him to his death at the hands of her brothers.

The story is something of an oddity in itself. It was rejected by Weird Tales on first publication, so Howard re-wrote the story to feature a character named Amra of Akbitana and re-submitted it under the name of 'Gods of the north'. Needless to say, this story is probably one of the most anthologized Conan stories now, even though, in my opinion, it doesn't really do a whole lot for his image, and actually goes some way towards the common (commonly wrong!) assumption that Conan is just a rampaging death machine like some sort of prehistoric Hulk. This is perhaps why I prefer this later placement, it allows for his shift in attitude to be explained by the hardships and frustrations which he has faced during his trip back north.

I'm not going to go into any more detail about the story itself, if you are a Conan fan and you haven't read this story yet, then clearly you need to rectify this oversight. It's been adapted by Marvel (Multiple times), Dark Horse, and is contained in its original form in the following: 

The Coming of Conan the Cimmerian: The Original Adventures of the Greatest Sword and Sorcery Hero of All Time! by Robert E. Howard

 So instead of boring you with a review of something about 90% of my readers have read already, lets just listen to some music instead. 

29. Ace Conan #2.2 "The Blood-stained God" by Robert E. Howard and L. Sprague DeCamp

When this story opens, we find Conan in Arenjun. He's chased some one there who took something from him. A stolen treasure map. This particular map leads to the temple of the blood-stained god. He finds several men torturing the one who stole his map, and interferes in their sport. In the confusion though he is knocked out, and the men who now have the map manage to escape on the trail of the blood-stained god.

Conan comes across another man, who is also seeking the treasure. The two join forces and set out south into the most forbidding reaches of the Kezankian mountains. It's a treacherous area sandwiched between Zamora and Koth, and also claimed by Turan. They reach it in a few days, and make their way into the mountains. Soon they have found the men who took the map, and make short work of them. Now all thats left is for them to find the treasure.

Deeper and deeper into the mountains they trek. Until eventually they come across a disguised door. Entering the chamber behind the door, they soon come face to face with the blood-stained god. Near the pedestal on which the god sits is a large and very deep pit. Probably where the priests threw the victims they sacrificed to the large gold, ruby encrusted idol. All is not as it seems however.

Upon approaching the idol, It moves. Standing up to its full height, The Blood-Stained God takes a few faltering steps towards Conan. He picks up a large piece of wood and slams the construct in the back, forcing it to lose balance and fall into the pit. With the endless wealth lost forever, Conan heads out into the morning sunshine and sets out for further adventures.


Review ~

This was a decent enough Conan tale. But of course, It's not really a Conan tale. It started out as a Kirby O'Donnel Tale and was set in Afghanistan, called 'Curse of the Crimson God'. L. Sprague DeCamp, in his haste to have more Conan yarns from which to reap rewards, altered the tale and made it into a Conan tale.

Though it really says a lot about both DeCamp and Howard that this tale worked. It shows that, Howard's writing is high quality and very adaptable (take note Hollywood!)no matter the venue or setting. It also shows how little respect DeCamp had for Howard's work, that he felt that all of Howard's characters were so one-dimensional you could simply substitute one for another. It worked this time. I think he did four that way, but this one was one of the best. One of the later ones, which we will not get too for some time, he left quite a few anachronisms present that really showed that it wasn't a true Conan yarn.

It also makes for a nice counterpoint to one of the earliest tales in the Conan Pastiche world too. The Thing in the Crypt, also featured a statue which comes to life. When taken with the Cult of Zath from Conan and the Spider-god, it really does feel as if a Chapter is looping back around to close in on itself in the life of Conan, which will completely lock tight when Conan returns to his homeland of Cimmeria in his next adventure.

Up Next, Conan the Valerous by John Maddox Roberts

Conan, The Stories that inspried the Movie.

So here we have it, the tie in book that actually reprints Howard's original stories. In this volume you get 6 of the best Conan yarns written. Including two of my personal favorites, "Rogues in the House" and "Tower of the Elephant". If you've read the novelization of the Marcus Nispel film, then you know that these two, along with another included tale "Queen of the Black Coast" are alluded to multiple times. Alas it seems, none of that made it into the movie itself. From early reviews it seems, the Novelization is worlds better than the film.
Fear not however as these 6 swashbuckling yarns will more than make up for the lack of coherent plot or abundance of Chicxulub impact site sized plot holes. They feature Conan at his most heroic, and his most un-heroic, showing the true depth of his character. Most importantly showing the range of Howard's capabilities as a writer.

If your a first time reader of Conan, and don't want to invest the nearly 50$ for the three volume Trade Paperback set then this book is for you. It has your name written all over. I envy you. Why, back in my day, all we had was tatty ol' Ace copies picked up from the trade-a-book. Kids these days. Just don't know how good you've got it.

So do yourself a favor and buy a copy of it on Amazon.

22. Ace Conan #1.6 "The Hand of Nergal" by Robert E. Howard and Lin Carter

Conan has finally accepted the offers of the pestering recruiting sergeants and signed into the service of Turan. At the start of this story, we find that that may have been a small miscalculation on the barbarians part. He is currently camped along with the other forces of General Bakra of Akif. While setting up his bed roll in camp, he comes across a golden amulet of some sort and puts it in his pouch.

Tomorrow he will be fighting in a battle between the forces of King Yildiz and a rebel satrap, Munthassem Khan. The Battle is raging when a sudden darkness sweeps over the field. Conan looks up to see horrific bat like creatures descend upon the arrayed forces, they ignore the forces of Munthassem Khan destroying only the forces of General Bakra. As the Bats sweep down soldiers flee in every direction. Conan left alone swears and grits his teeth to steel himself against the darkness. One of the creatures sweeps down upon him, and just as the end is closing in he is overcome with the sudden urgency to bring out the amulet he found. Upon doing so the creature recoils and flees. Exhaustion overtakes him and Conan collapses.

The next day Conan awakes among the ruin of the battlefield, straggling through the bodies he comes across a girl named Hidilco, who has come looking for him. Her master, the Sorcerer Atalis has sent her, and bids Conan return with her. So the two journey to Yaralet. Upon arriving at Hidilco's master's house, he regales Conan of how Munthassem Khan found something from Stygia. The something was the hand of Nergal. With it he became a madman. Further, the key to defeating Munthassem and the Hand of Nergal is the amulet which Conan found. The heart of Tammuz.

Atalis, Hidilco and Conan set off to the Khan's palace. They make their way inside to the throne room and find the Khan. It's soon a battle of Magical talismans and brawn. Conan and the Heart of Tammuz against Munthassem Khan and the Hand of Nergal. The confrontation climaxes with the Heart overriding the hand and pure energy overwhelming flesh. After the flash, nothing remains of Munthassem Khan but ashes, and both the heart and hand have evaporated entirely.

Nothing is left for Conan but to return to the army.



Review~

Well this is another of the Posthumous collaborations, an exceptionally rare one in that it's the only completion which Lin Carter worked on exclusively. It's not a bad story, with fairly competent writing. It would of course have been far more interesting had Robert E. Howard have finished it himself.

Up next "The City of Skulls"

19. Ace Conan #1.5, 'Rogues in the House' by Robert E. Howard.

From Hyborean Apocrypha

Having decided He didn't quite fancy sticking around in the western Hyborian nations Conan has headed south again. we pick up his trail in an unnamed border city somewhere on the Corinthian-Zamoran Border. Conan's pretty easy to find, he's doing time. Killed a lying scumbag of a priest/fence (aren't they all?) who along with a prostitute ratted him out to the cops.

But local weenie Murillo has a job for the doughty Cimmerian. He wants a man named Nabonidas bumped off, and thinks Conan can do the job. The reward will be a bag of coin and a fast horse to get him over the Zamoran Border. He also wants dinner. Conan escapes, gets his revenge on the trull by tossing her into a cesspit and goes on his way to see the man he's been paid to kill.

Conan arrives to find things are not as expected. Murillo is here for some reason, and is in a prison cell with Nabonidas. A third party's machinations are at work. The three agree to work together to escape, they then make their way through the mansion. They discover the interloper is none other than Nabonidas's semi-intelligent simian pet. Thak the ape-man.

Conan fights the ape man and barely manages to defeat him, and grappling with the idea that he didn't fight an animal but a man. Nabonidas is not perhaps a noble as Thak as he turns on Murillo and Conan. This leaves no choice but for Conan to follow through with the original bargain and kill Nabonidas after all. The two remaining men, Murillo and Conan leave the villa and head their separate ways.


Review -

Wow.

What else is there to say about Rogues? This is a fantastic tale. It has some of the most memorable aspects connected with the Conan character. Namely clubbing the guard with a beef bone. The fight with Thak, and Conan's feelings afterwards are interesting and show an insight into the character. This tale along with 'Tower of the Elephant' and 'God in the Bowl' really do a lot to establish just what sort of man the Cimmerian is. It's really no surprise the Conan reprints did as well as they did. Say what you will about 'The Thing in the Crypt'.. but the whole book has been jam packed with good stories so far. The weakest being the 'Halls of the Dead'.. coincidentally the one that LsDC "Co-wrote".

17. Ace Conan #1.4 "The God in the Bowl" by Robert E. Howard

From Hyborean Apocrypha

Continuing on westward on the Corinthian road after having dealt with Sovartus, Conan has made his way to Nemedia. He tries to replicate his life of thievery that he thrived on in Zamora. Thing's don't work out too well as he breaks into a museum, is caught and is framed for murder. Conan protests his innocence, and states he was hungry and looking for food. The inspector is smarter than that and deduces that the brawny barbarian was payed to break in. His employer throws him under the wheel and Conan incensed with such disloyalty turns on him and the charge of murder is now earned. While this is going on a creature of some horrible lineage escapes from the stonewear vessel it was kept in and goes on a killing spree. It transpires that this vessel was intend as a gift to the priest of Mitra, but that it had been left for safe keeping in the Museum. The owner of said museum, overwhelmed by greed had broken the bronze bands securing the lid and let loss the creature. Conan eventually escapes to continue his adventures in Nemedia, while earning the ire of the high priest of Set in the process. This is the first time that Conan's path has crossed with Thoth Amon, but it won't be the last.

Review -

This is another Robert E. Howard Original story. A Very short one at that, even by Howard's Standards, at a scant 24 pages, but it packs A LOT of punch into those pages. It's no doubt been tampered with by DeCamp but I'm not enough of an REH scholar to identify the alterations. It's also an odd one chronologically, The common assumption these days is that this is a very very early Conan story, he's naive of civilization and trusting of people he shouldn't be. In the bulk of new chronologies it's set as either the first or second Conan story. However in the process of adding in the Pastiches that placement becomes difficult. It's simply not possible to work in a side trip from his wanderings in Brythunia and Corinthia and have him make it to Numalia and then back to Zamora for "Tower of the Elephant" and still include the other novels.. It could be done, but It just dosen't work really well.

The easiest way to make the nearly feral attitude of Conan into the over all chronology at this point, Is that, he's shown repeatedly lying to the authorities. So its easy to simply assume that he's just lying about more than the reader is lead to believe. It dosen't require us to do anything but read a slightly different motivation from Howard's words. This approach may not work with the unaltered text, but it does work with this version. The Character of Nemedia is also clearly very very different from that of the places where Conan has been so far, and if he's really new in town, he may simply not be aware of how all the peices fall any more than he was of Zamora way back in "Tower of the Elephant". Numalia seems to be a very regimented society, with little corruption and an insatiable appetite for "Justice". I can easily imagine Dionus, Posthumo and Demetrio dressed in S.S. Uniforms and spitting "Ve Huf Veys uf meking joo Tulk" fulling intending to do it, Conan seems to be in a bit over his head, and it's no wonder he dosen't intend to stick around. Zamora may be corrupt and dangerous, but its safer for a man like him.

Up next, Conan the Warlord by Leonard Carpenter (I can feel the bile rising in my throat as I type this)

15. Ace Conan #1.3 , "The Halls of the Dead"

From Hyborean Apocrypha

This is the third short story presented in the old Ace Conan books, its the first of the "DeCamp Completions" and in my opinion is one of the better ones. It would originally have been the very first appearance of Shadizar, but in this it will be closer to the 4th or so... But still has little happening in the city.. Conan has gotten tired of not doing much and has decided to head slightly south west of the city to where a ruin of a city exists, Larsha. And having made a nuisance of himself to the nobles of Zamora over the last several months he's also being pursued by an old acquaintance, the Gunderman guardsmen Captain who we last saw many moons ago in Arenjun.

Conan is far more canny than the captain knows, and his men walk rather blindly into a tripwire deadfall the Barbarian has set for them. The captain, named Nestor, and Conan engage in a duel but things go poorly for the Gunderman when the Cimmerian strikes him and knocks him out. Conan then goes about his way finding a way into the city. Conan runs afoul of a very large and very angry acid spitting slug which gives him some chase until he manages to scale a wall and drop something very heavy on it. Coming down to make sure it is dead he turns to find Nestor again, this time not so intent on murder as coming to a mutual understanding to search the city for its treasure and split the take.

The Two men then begin to make their way deeper into the city, after making their way into the vaults they find the treasure, they load up their satchels but fall afoul a necromantic boobietrap. Triggering several mummies to attack them, these are nearly impervious to blows so the two adventurers decide that discretion is the better part of valour and lead the mummies for a chase through the city. Upon exiting the cities walls the curse is broken and the mummies crumble to dust. But it also causes an earthquake which finishes off the ruins of the city. Worse still Conan's partner is no where to be seen, assuming Nestor has been killed Conan returns to Shadizar.

That night in the tavern which Conan has chosen for his reveries the City guard bursts in intent on his arrest. The Magistrate leading them explains they had captured Nestor but he escaped and the jewels which he had had turned to dust. They confiscate Conan's treasure which was a jade statue of a serpent. When the magistrate reaches into the sack he finds its no longer just a statue and quickly dies from envenomation.. Conan uses this opportunity to escape and hits the road heading westward towards Corinthia.

Review - This is one of the better Posthumous collaborations, and one of the less irksome. I really dunno what else to say about it as I've read it several times and consider it a good enough tale. It's interesting as it's one of the 3 possible stories featuring the Gunderman Nestor. The others being Tower of the Elephant and Hand of Nergal.

8. Ace Conan #1.2, Conan: The Tower of the Elephant

Alright Folks, after months of cracking open nuts to find only wasp larvae inside.. we finally get to a good one..



This is of course the Edited version of REH's story, the one present in the first volume of the Ace series. I'm not really sure what DeCamp edited from it but that also isn't really important for the purposes of this. Lets get on with the story.

We Find Conan in Arenjun, The So called City of Thieves, in the run down quarter of the city, The Maul. Here people would as soon slip a knife into you as look at you. Conan is in a drinking hall, listening to a bellicose kidnapper relate for an audience just how skilled he is. The kidnapper chances to reference the famed Elephant Tower, it's sorceress master Yara and his prized possession, the so called Heart of the Elephant Gem.

Intrigued, Conan approaches him and asks him some small few questions in regards it. He remark's that he has heard of this tower and would know more of it, especially why with it being so easy looking no one has yet pilfered it's coffers before? His sincere boasting is taken as the trait of an idiot, and the Kidnapper wants no more from him. Before this conversation is finished the kidnapper lays dead and Conan is on his way to make his fortunes by trying his hand at the Elephant Tower.

The climb itself is simple for one raised in the craggy peaks of Cimmeria, he adroitly scales the wall and finds himself in a Garden. He also finds himself in the presence of one whom he has already heard some what of, Tarsus the Nemedian, so called prince of Thieves. Tarsus explains a few finer points of thieving to the young Cimmerian, and the two agree to work together to scale the tower. The two thieves have a run in with a giant spider, one which Tarsus does not survive. Conan opts to continue on without him.

He Makes his way into the tower, eventually entering a large throne room. Seated on this throne is a large being. Conan is at first repulsed, but then the creature speaks, and despite its outward appearance we recognize it's inward humanity, It's name is Yag Kosha, one of a race of interstellar beings who has been enslaved, tortured, blinded and held captive by Yara.

This being, rueful of his circumstances beseeches Conan to end it's life of torments. But in an act of revenge against yara, also explains to Conan what he must do.. He must soak the Gemstone with the blood of the Yog Kosha, and then deliver the gem to Yara telling him that "Yag Kosha gives a last and mighty gift!".. Yara recoils as the magic takes hold of him, Shrinking him, and ultimately absorbing him into the jewel. A terrible rumble begins and Conan makes his way out of Yara's tower just before the whole building collapses around him.

Locations - Zamora
Towns/Cities - Arenjun
Characters - Conan The Cimmerian, Tarsus: Prince of thieves
Languages Spoken - Cimmerian, Aesir, Hyperborean, Brythunian, Zamoran

Observations -

Instead of reviewing this tale which I couldn't give justice too, I shall simply make a few observations about this immovable way point along Conan's road. The Pastiches swirl and eddy around the REH tales like water into rocks. They are movable and mailable, REH's tales are not. I firmly believe it is not the place of the Robert E. Howard stories to change to suit the overall continuity, it is the job of the artificially constructed Continuity to find ways to fill gaps, without causing to many headaches for the reader.

So why is Conan now in Arenjun instead of Shadizar?

Regardless that when we last saw Conan he was outside of Shadizar, and he is now In Arenjun, a considerable distance further east. All of the Pastiche-Inclusive continuities agree that TOE follows the Steve Perry books. So we will try and find things that connect them to it.

He has in this story the "Battered scabbard" and "High strapped sandals" which he was given in "Conan the Defiant".. So even if Perry gets his Geography wrong, he manages to keep Conan's costume much the same through all his books in order so that it won't conflict with REH. So thats one thing, a second is that we can conjecture from this tale that, at some point in the recent past Conan has been in some place to have heard of both the Elephant Tower, and Tarsus, prince of Thieves. From which one could infer that he has been to Shadizar and some eventuality has caused him to leave it after having only arrived and continued east, should one be so inclined.

This is the best supposition I can come up with, and I think it is probably best, seeing as the alternative would have been more Steve Perry books.. that those so inclined simply use their imaginations to fill in the gaps which still linger. While the DeCamp helmed the pastiches, he took the view that, he could force REH's tales to conform to his ideas and especially to his new stories. This was revisionist and totally unacceptable, especially because it was done in order to make Him money, and not to promote Robert E. Howard's Creation. However, the Tor guidelines seemed to be more Laissez-faire even than that, Minimum outlay, maximum return.. without even as much effort put into some of them as your average Dragonlance novel would have had at the same time.

Next up is the first part of a Conan Trilogy written by Andrew J. Offutt.

Statement of Purpose.

Beginning in a few weeks I will be embarking on a voyage that I've been told is crazy, but I feel it must be done.

Over the last few years I've collected the entire run of Conan Pastiches from Ace, Bantam and Tor books. And thanks to one William Galen Grey, I have an order with which to read them in. So this blog's purpose will be for me to chronicle this adventure.

I've named the blog Hyborean Apocrypha, these works are Spurious and of Doubtful Authenticity, both definitions which pertain to the word. They are not authorized by Robert E. Howard the creator of Conan, but were written to begin with by L. Sprague DeCamp, Lin Carter and Bjorn Nyberg, and then later by such now Fantasy Superstars as Robert Jordan.

I will be reading the novels and short stories in the order of WGG's timeline. Starting with Harry Turtledoves Conan of Venarium, when I've finished the initial run of 99 Novels and Short stories, I will read the 3 " Apocryphal works " Conan the Bold, Conan the Barbarian and Conan the Destroyer.